1. The child does not learn, he absorbs. Everything he feels, sees, hears, smells and taste becomes stored in his subconscious. They make him. They become his personality.
2. Children have two energies, the physical and the mental. If separated, the child becomes disorientated. For example, a child jumping on a spring bed is using his mental energy to understand the intensity between jumps that propels him higher. He is also using his physical energy to exercise, right?
Then mama comes around and beats him for trying to spoil the bed. His harmonious energies immediately becomes scattered in all directions. The energies play out in different forms: the child withdraws, develops some bad or naughty habit or just feels he isn’t good enough for anything.
3. In childhood, the child seeks to understand his environment and destroys due to inexperience and adults not patient enough to teach. So also, in adolescence, the child seeks to establish himself as a member of the society and makes some bad decisions due to inexperience.
You want to help? Never say never to them! Just give all the different options and show why you prefer a particular option.
Parenting is not an easy task. I fear parents who say it is. It is a lot of trying to understand possible reasons for a child’s action and taking the pains to explain pros and cons. Never substituting your will for the child’s will. Else, he becomes an adult with a weak character.